So much of my writing about weight loss has focused on the struggles. So much so, that sometimes I feel like my posts should end with a sad trombone sound effect, like Debbie Downer. But then I think, well, maybe that’s just a reflection of my personality. I think the tough stuff—the sad, the bad, the shameful—is often times more truthful, and more interesting. And some harder aspects of the journey I feel aren’t talked about nearly enough, so I like to focus on those. But despite all of the many struggles I’ve had and share online (and all the ones I’m sure I’m yet to face), I’d still say that overall, the journey has been amazingly positive.
Of course I still have problems and struggle with emotional eating—that is just a reality—but life since my weight loss is so much better. Losing weight has been such a comfort in my day-to-day. When I reached a weight I finally felt good at, so much of my stress lifted—or at least, shifted. Now, I don’t panic every time someone takes a picture of me. Now, boarding an airplane isn’t anxiety inducing. Now, I don’t enter a complete flop-sweat the second someone invites me to an event, contemplating a juice cleanse while frantically googling which brand of shape wear has the strongest hold. Now, I can stop apologizing to strangers constantly fearing I’m taking up too much space—everywhere. Now, I feel less burdened than I ever have.
If you have never been fat, it’s impossible to imagine what goes through a fat person’s mind in every single interaction in life. Everything is colored by your size. There’s some concern that every single person you come across will be inconvenienced or offended by your fatness. It’s a burden heavier than any amount of fat, and it’s much harder to shed. Losing weight won’t solve all of your problems. Of course it won’t. But at least it will give you the freedom to finally focus on something other than your fatness.