Happy New Year, my friends! I hope you’re healthy, safe, and that 2021 brings you all that you hope it will.
Play more music
We have a radio/cd player in our dining room, second-handed from my parents, who weren’t using it any longer. When we got it this past summer, I played Graceland like it was just released, and for all of December I had the radio tuned to Magic 106.7, where it’s all Christmas music all the time. Whenever something’s playing, it feels like whatever I’m doing has an added layer of richness and meaning. It’s like our house is sunnier and more alive. I want more of that.
Don’t catastrophize so much
I’m really great at catastrophizing. For anyone who’s healthy and well-adjusted and doesn’t know catastrophizing—it’s the ability to take one feeling or situation and blow it up into a catastrophe. Maybe you wake up feeling a little anxious one morning and rather than just accepting that, hey, I feel off today, you analyze the feeling to death. You ask yourself, but what does it MEAN that I’m anxious?? You think of all the things that make you anxious and the more you search, the more you find. By the end of the day, you’ve convinced yourself that you aren’t just having an anxious day, you ARE an anxious person who will probably always feel this way. And that’s a feature of catastrophizing—lots of “always” (I’ll always feel this way) or “never” (I’ll never be able to) thinking. For me, I can have an inkling of a feeling—like a wave of exhaustion will hit—and I’ll begin to spiral, wondering how I’ll ever accomplish anything ever again considering I’ll always be this tired. It’s not at all helpful or useful. Nothing lasts forever—not the bad or the good—and I need to remember that. If I’m tired today maybe I’ll get good rest tonight and tomorrow will feel easier than today did. If I’m unmotivated and procrastinating today, who knows how I’ll feel tomorrow? Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to focus and commit to action.
Create a cleaning schedule
Maybe this is just what it is to be a mom of little kids or an adult with a desire to live in a clean home, but I feel like I’m always cleaning. Every time I clean the mirror in the bathroom I say to myself, didn’t I just do this?! Or I’ll find a pile of god-knows-what kind of crumbs on the floor and I’ll ask, didn’t I just vacuum this morning?! (I did) So maybe a flexible cleaning schedule would help. Some kind of calendar system to mark what I’ll clean and when. There are daily things, like wiping down the kitchen counters and vacuuming, weekly things like cleaning the bathrooms and washing the floors, and monthly things like scrubbing our glass shower doors.
Remember the connection between how I eat and how I feel
It was a younger version of me that only connected how I ate and how I looked. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve found that it’s gotten easier and easier to navigate eating by staying conscious of how I feel. I’ve collected enough data to know that sweets leave me tired and wanting, that burritos right before bed cause me night sweats, and that going for that third (or fourth) slice will have me waking in the night with heartburn. Tuning in to how I feel when I eat this way or that way makes me more aware of how I want to feel (which is clear-minded, able to focus, and energetic). Here’s hoping for more of that in 2021.
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These are just some simple ideas that I think will help make day-to-day life a little brighter and easier. What are you planning on focusing on in 2021?
Clean Mama does a daily cleaning schedule. Monday…bathrooms, Tuesday…dusting, etc. It’s completely free!
I am a huge fan of Clean Mama—she is nonjudgmental and encouraging. Her system has really helped me this past year. It took a while for me to implement it to the degree I have it at now, but even getting some of the tasks done sometimes made me feel a whole lot better.
This post is great and spoke to me so much, especially the catastrophizing and being on the cleaning hamster wheel. And let’s not forget the added layer of covid anxiety…so much fun (not!) ;) Anyway, thanks for this Andie.
I was afraid since we hadn’t had a blog post from you that something was wrong. I over-analyze things and worry also. Sadly my daughter inherited this trait. If I don’t feel up to par, I analyze what could possibly be wrong I was an overachiever when it came to cleaning. I had a recipe box, On the cards, I wrote when the windows were washed, the furnace filter changed, the oven cleaned, the cupboards cleaned, etc. I cleaned the bathrooms and vacuumed every day in addition to working full-time. This was the world of the 70s mom. I’m sure I missed spending time with my children and taking walks and just hanging out because I was so busy cleaning. The moral of the story is: Be clean enough to be healthy but don’t let it get the better of you. Your children are only young once. What they do is priceless and not to be missed. Your home will always get dirty for as long as you live in one. There will always be fingerprints and crumbs on the floor.
I do think my idea of the recipe box is a good one. I used to keep ingredients for cleaning organically as well as I had an idea when the furnace filter was changed and the heavier cleaning had been done last. Today it could be kept on a simple spreadsheet. Thank you for your blog. I won’t worry now but know that you are doing well.
So happy you are well!!!! Do pray you come out of this valley you are in!!! you will figure out your schedule for your week. Just save your weekends for family and some time for yourself in order to rebuild your tank. The children will be ok if you have some time for yourself and time for you and your husband at least 1 date night each month!!! As woman we have many baskets to juggle as you well know. You can do this and remember a spotless house will really never happen and that is OK once children are all grown and out of the house you will have soo much time on your hand you will be able to eat off the floor!!! Happy 2021!!
Andie, My husband and I started playing instrumental music throughout the house for the last many crazy months. We felt we needed some calm in our lives. Sometimes it’s jazz instrumental, Christmas instrumental, etc. We walk from room to room and always a soothing sound. Also, Netflix has a Headspace meditation that is awesome! I do it at night before bed and it really sets the stage for a good nights sleep! Be Well
Did I write this? Sheesh that sounds both similar to how I’ve been AND how I want to move going forward;) Thank you for the clarity!
great post , keep sharing
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I just wanted to drop a line & say that I also have a connection to Graceland. I grew up with it & have so many memories of listening to it with my dad. It’s like an instant happy pill when I turn it on.
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your new resolution it so inspiring me for adding my ew resolution in this year. I wish I can do this new resolution. Thank you so much for inspiring me from your blogs :)
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Jeez, do we all have the same mental issues after staying at home for a while because of a global pandemic? Like, all these resolutions were in my head when I was counting down the last ten seconds of 2020. Wish everyone strong health both physical and mental, I guess we really need this. And hope all your resolutions will come to life, so next year you’ll wish for something different rather than your old ones to come true!
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So to anyone who wants to reach their goals in 2021: use this comment as your motivation! don’t give up and work hard, but also remember to take breaks when necessary :)
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Amazing!